“But where would we hide it all” asked Jim. See an hour ago, Jim and his friend Kim stole 15 million dollars from the bank but, now, they had nowhere to hide it and the cops would be on them in seconds. Kim suggested “How about we pick up all the money we can and run even if we lose more than half the money we will still get a fat stack of money!” They picked up all the money they could and started to get in the car when the police found them, quickly Jim stepped on the gas!
Hi Dominik,
ReplyDeleteThank you for you 100WC entry this week. I really enjoyed reading it. I especially liked how you have used a variety of dialogue and narrative to tell the story. To make your writing even better, you could make sure you have put all the final punctuation in. Sometimes, you have used a comma when a full stop would have been better. Keep trying hard with your writing.
Mrs McG (Team 100WC)
Derbyshire, England