Once upon a time there was a boy named Bob he was a very nice boy he would always goes to bed at six o’clock and say “goodnight” to his parents. One night Bob went to bed he looked up at the ceiling there was this strange green light coming from a crack in the ceiling “slime?” Jeff thought. “Yep thats definitely slime” said Bob. Bob was scared the slime dripped through the crack in the ceiling and fell onto his bedroom floor then it turned into a teenager it steared at Bob with a freaky smile “ My name is JJJJEEEEFFF”
Jeff said. “AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!.....”
Wow Reuben - you've really demonstrated the importance of having the right title. In this case it's the title that lets the reader know what happens in the end, without it you would be confused about what happened next. Did you know how clever you were being? One thing I think could have been improved, is that last long sentence. A little more punctuation would help pace the action better.
ReplyDelete