Thursday, June 7, 2018

The Sausage Dog by Dyani

Once there was a sausage dog, named Poppy and she was huge. She was about fifty centimetres long. She lived in a house with a mum and a dad and a child name Connor. Every day mum went to work with dad to sell pink daffodils and Connor went to school. Poppy was left alone, so she went to a beautiful pink bridge.Then it sprinkled with snowflakes. One landed on her tongue. Poppy shook it hard because it was stuck but it melted quickly. She chased her tail all day long because she was excited, until she fell down.

4 comments:

  1. Great first attempt at the 100 Word Challenge.
    I like the way you have described the snowflakes exciting Poppy so much.
    We worked together on using the pronoun 'she'. See if you can use pronouns carefully to avoid repeating names too often in your next writing.

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  2. Poppy sounds like a lot of fun for a sausage dog! I like the way you have used short sentences to make the story very direct and informative. It drives the plot along nicely.

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  3. Your description of Poppy makes me want to meet her! The description of Poppy excitedly chasing her tail after the snowflake melted on her tongue was really nicely written.

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  4. Dyani, I can see a dog doing this with a snowflake on their tongue!

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